Let me tell you a little secret I’ve learned as a body-positive sex educator: some of the most incredible positions for intimacy, pleasure, and connection aren’t always the ones we see in mainstream media. One position that often flies under the radar but absolutely deserves center stage is the scissors sex position.
Now, I know what you’re thinking: “Scissoring? Isn’t that just for same-sex couples?” My answer is loud and proud: nope, not even close. This position is for every body – all orientations, all gender expressions, all shapes and sizes. The scissors position is one of the most beautiful, intimate, and surprisingly versatile moves out there. And I’m going to guide you through it like the trusted, body-positive bestie you deserve.
What Is the Scissors Sex Position?
Definition and Basic Mechanics
At its core, the scissors sex position involves both partners lying on their sides, with one leg from each person interlaced like, well, a pair of scissors. That interlocking leg setup allows for pelvic-to-pelvic connection and angled grinding, rubbing, or penetration depending on your anatomy and intentions.
This position often gets associated with vulva-to-vulva sex, particularly in depictions of lesbian intimacy. But please don’t be fooled by the stereotype – scissors can be adapted for any couple who wants to play with angles, friction, creative contact, and deep connection.
Common Variations
- Classic side-by-side scissors: Each person lies facing inward, one top leg lifted and hooked over the other’s thigh. This is the original vibe and works great for similar-height partners.
- Seated scissors: Sit upright, interlace legs while sitting, and use hands or toys for stimulation. Perfect for added eye contact and control.
- Reclined scissors with props: Use pillows to prop up your hips and maintain alignment if body types or mobility call for a little extra support. I swear by a sturdy wedge pillow or a firm cushion between the knees.
How to Do the Scissors Position
Step-by-Step Guide
Here’s exactly how I walk couples through this position during my workshops:
- Start lying on your side facing your partner, bodies aligned.
- Lift your top leg and thread it between your partner’s legs, allowing one of their legs to rest between yours.
- Adjust your hips so your pelvises are angled toward each other.
- Find a rocking, grinding, or thrusting rhythm that works for your pleasure zones. This could be clitoral, vaginal, penile, or a delicious combo.
- Support yourselves with your arms or a pillow behind your back if needed.
Tips for Comfort and Stability
- Use a firm mattress or nesting blanket pile to avoid sinking in. Soft surfaces mess with alignment.
- Pillows under hips can change the angle and make contact easier for differently-shaped bodies.
- Don’t force flexibility – change the width of your ‘scissor’ by shifting legs closer or farther out.
- Go slow. This isn’t a jackhammer position – it’s rhythmic, sensual, and perfectly paced for indulgence.
Why the Scissors Position Feels So Intimate
Physical Closeness
There’s no way around it: scissors puts your entire lower body in contact with your partner. Thigh to thigh, pelvis to pelvis, nipples often brushing – it’s a full-body experience that feels incredibly close, because every inch of pressure is shared and responsive.
Eye Contact and Body Synchronization
Since you’re facing each other, there’s nothing stopping direct, soul-melting eye contact (unless you close your eyes from bliss – that’s valid too). Plus, the grindy rhythm builds a kind of unspoken conversation between your bodies. Over time, you naturally sync up and start moving as one.
Benefits of the Scissors Position
Enhanced Pleasure and Stimulation
If clitoral or outer-penile stimulation is your sweet spot, then listen up: scissors delivers. This position creates pressure and friction exactly where it counts, especially when bodies are angled just right. Add lube, a bullet vibe, or even a hand, and the combo is chef’s kiss.
Emotional Connection
It’s hard to explain, but there’s a tenderness to this position. It invites intimacy without the intensity of some penetrative positions. You’re touching, watching, feeling – not just engaging genitals, but bonding physically and emotionally.
Great for Same-Sex and Heterosexual Couples
Whether you’re vulva-to-vulva, penis-to-vulva, strap-to-anything, or just using hands and hips, scissors is truly versatile. I’ve guided countless couples across the sexuality spectrum into this position, and the joy is universal when they discover how adaptable it is.
Common Challenges and How to Make It More Comfortable
Flexibility and Positioning Issues
I won’t lie – if you’re tight in the hips, scissors can feel awkward at first. Don’t push through pain; change your angle instead. Try lying less on your side and more on your back or stomach. Even a hybrid scissor-side position can reduce strain.
Adjusting for Different Body Types
If one or both of you are plus-size (like me), this position might need a few smart tweaks. Pillows under the belly or between the knees can give better leverage. Widening your scissor spread helps avoid thigh smushing and improves movement space. Trust me – once you crack your variation, it’s your favorite move forever.
Who Can Enjoy the Scissors Position?
Same-Sex Couples
Yes, scissors has long been celebrated for vulva-to-vulva play, but it’s far from limited. Strap-ons, toys, and hand techniques all thrive in this position. For penis-to-penis contact, the sideways movement also accommodates frottage beautifully.
Heterosexual Couples
Penetrative sex in a scissors position? Totally possible. Just align the bodies slightly off-center so the penis (or strap) enters at an angle. It’s especially delicious if you or your partner enjoy deep, angled thrusts rather than straight-on movement.
People Exploring Versatile Positions
If traditional missionary or doggy isn’t doing it for you anymore, scissors brings a breath of fresh, intimate air. It teaches you to tune into slow pleasure and how to create stimulation through movement, not just pounding.
Tips to Enhance the Experience
Use of Pillows or Props
- A wedge pillow changes angles to target sweet spots better.
- Pillows between thighs can keep legs from tiring quickly.
- Even a yoga bolster under your back can help if you want a semi-reclined angle.
Recommended Lubrication
Friction is great – irritation, not so much. Always use a generous amount of water or silicone-based lube (depending on your play style). For same-sex scissors or dry-grind stimulation, lube is what makes skin-on-skin contact slippery instead of sticky.
Incorporating Toys or Hands
Vibrators, dildos, wands, and your beautiful fingers – they all deserve a place in this party. I love slipping a bullet vibe between bodies for extra clit stimulation, or using a partner’s hand mid-grind to hit all the right places.
Safety, Consent, and Comfort
Clear Communication
Before trying scissors, have that honest chat: “Do you want to try this?” or “Let’s experiment with something intimate and close.” Being upfront gives everyone space to consent, explore, and safely adjust without pressure or confusion.
Listening to Your Partner’s Needs
This is a position that invites ongoing feedback. I always tell couples to do the pause-check: “How does that feel?”, “Wanna try a pillow?” “Are we aligned enough?” These check-ins don’t kill the mood – they actually deepen it.
So, here’s the big takeaway: the scissors sex position is not just a novelty act – it’s a deeply intimate, wildly adaptable, and seriously arousing way to connect. Don’t let outdated stereotypes keep you from discovering its full potential. Every body deserves creative, loving, sensual sex – and scissors might just become your new go-to once you try the right variation.
So grab your pillows, lube up, and get ready to feel something totally new. And when your legs finally unlock with that blissed-out afterglow? You’ll know exactly why scissoring deserves a starring role in your bedroom playbook.
